Thoughts, Time, Technology ...... self assessment

This is a shot I took of Daria last weekend. Because I've not been blogging much, you may not be aware that I'm doing photography regularly now.

No I haven't given up on blogging. I have however realized how easy it is to let the busyness of daily life or the easiness of technology overshadow some of the things I enjoy that add sustenance to my day. For the record, I love to blog. I love to read my friends blogs. Period. I just absolutely love reading my close friend's blogs, and I like to blog. I love it more than I will ever even remotely like Facebook. In fact I have a like/hate relationship with Facebook. There are only a handful of reasons I like Facebook. 1. Easy to find and catch up on people or acquaintances that we've lost contact with over the years. 2. Get a message or pictures out to a lot of people quickly. 3. Keep up on events or groups of interest. But let's be honest, how is it possible to maintain over 300 friendships? if all those people were close "friends" would we have had to track them down? Or do we just have a fascination of peaking into someone elses life? The reasons I love to hate Facebook are too many to list here. But it boils down to one thing, it takes a lot more to maintain and fortify a relationship than a comment on Facebook will ever do.

Ok, ok, before anyone becomes offended or feels guilty, I am NOT trying to tell people they shouldn't use Facebook or that it's a bad thing. I mean, quite frankly I use Facebook too. It has its usefulness. But I still love to hate it. But for me personally I would rather pick up the phone and hear my friends voice, go to lunch, or read their blog describing life's ups, downs, joys, sorrows, defeats & victories, than to read a one line comment on Facebook that is nothing more than glorified texting. Both share information but I prefer the blogs. Phone calls, time in person, and blogs make me feel connected with my friends. It's the blogs that make me realize that we are all in the same big boat, good days, bad days, etc. For the record I recognize that blogging is not for everyone. I totally get it. But who can't pick up the phone? There's not one shoe that fits all, and sometimes the only way one may know about what is going on in someone elses life is through Facebook. But as I look back on the previous months where my blogging has slowed and where my "checking" Facebook activity has gone up made me think about how I spend my time. How do I put energy into my friendships? Is it good use of time that strengthens my relationship with that person? It's that "good" "better" "best" scenario that each person needs to decide for themselves what is most important to them. As usual, technology can be a blessing but with it always comes the challenge to maintain real one on one contact with another human being. It also challenges the ability to have a "real" thoughtful long conversation. Gone are the days of letter writing where the deep thoughts of one's heart were penned on pages of paper. I'm a hopeless lover of turn of the century letters where loved ones penned endless pages of their life to each other. E-mails and blogs took their place. But I've noticed another trend. Even e-mail writing has almost diminished and seems to be dominated by forwards or news and no longer the electronic way of sending a letter. I'm guilty of that too. Blogs have slowed. But one thing that has continued to rise is Facebook, yet often it lacks depth, substanance and doesn't really tell someone what is REALLY going on in their life. Like anyone else my challenge is to make more phone calls, spend more time, and write a little bit more.

I read a book years ago, titled "In the Company of Women". I don't remember too much about the book accept that it detailed how women are relationship beings. We are happier and even have better marriages when we have friendships. But it showed the statistics where women are so busy that they really are usually surrounded by endless "close acquaintances" and not "good friends" because they have to many acquaintances and not enough time to develop them into strong friendships. I really believe that is true. I don't ever think I've met a woman who has not said at one time "I wish I had a close friend." Like I said earlier, being a mother is a blessing, being a busy mother has it's blessings, technology has it's blessings...... but as with all things, without moderation, without balance and without nurturing what is important we can miss out on what really IS important.

Again, I did not blog this to make anyone feel bad for not blogging, writing, or calling. Quite the opposite, I wrote it because 1. The original reason I started to blog was to keep my family up to date on the day to day details of my life 2. To journal 3. To "keep it real" inspired by my friend Becky H. (from Utah) who at one time mentioned that she enjoyed blogs that "keep it real". 4. When I print my blog into a Blurb book to read later I want my children to see that even adults struggle with over use of technology and have to re-prioritize. 5. To keep myself accountable to what I think is important in my life.... capturing my personal history, one personal experience and sentence at a time even the relentless boring repetitive routine days.

Years down the road my grandchildren and great grandchildren will be able to get to know me by what I've written about my life. Something that Facebook will never be able to capture.